NaPoWriMo - 2019 #15 - Leveraging agile methodology for a more perfect world

Leveraging agile methodology for a more perfect world

We groom the backlog every week
and it's a list
of national and World figures
who we could do without.
I am a grunt.
I don't get near the clients
an operation's going to the wire
when the Elision Captain might get
me on my headset and say
"just take the razor and meander down
to the second floor,
our guy's just coming to the toilet door
and he's unaccompanied..."
So I did that

and they extracted me
with the matte black silent chopper
which was cool
and everybody brought me drinks,
watching the local cops
all panic via the hidden cams.  That's not
my normal day at all
I once spent thirteen weeks
beneath a manhole cover in Madrid,
to cleaners in a service lift, and once
we opened a restaurant,
an actual restaurant, outside the local
government offices in--

well let's not name that place,
statutes of limitations and the like.
We are the Deletions Subcommittee
Action Scrum Team "Kraken" and we do
what needs to be done, because
assassination is an important part
of Society two-point-naught;
we de-fly the ointment,
eliminating stumbling blocks
who thrust
their psychopathic personalities
onto a worldly stage which runs
more smoothly without their ilk,
or putting it more relatably

we do in those
who have it coming.  Anyway,
my daily stand-up meeting's soon,
so what did you...?
The suggestions box?
It's over there.  But don't worry;
he's already on the list.



  • "Agile" is a family of software development methodologies, similar to lean manufacturing techniques.
  • "Scrum" is one of those methodologies.
  • A "backlog" is a list of tasks which may be done in the future.
  • "Grooming" is sorting, elucidating and tidying.
  • A "daily stand-up" is a very short daily meeting where everybody says what they're doing and what the problems are.
  • "Elision Captain" I made up, but is similar to a "Product Owner" being the person who makes decisions about what is valuable to a product/project.
  • It's a good thing most geeks don't actually want to control the world.

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